Relationships Archives | Somatic Therapist NYC - Michele L. Kong, CPC, SEP, LP

Somatic Therapy for Social Anxiety

What is Social Anxiety? Social anxiety involves persistent fear, self-consciousness, or distress in situations where you may feel observed, evaluated, or judged by others. For some, it may show up as avoiding parties, meetings, groups, public speaking, unfamiliar social situations, even dating. For others, social anxiety can be less visible. You might attend social events while internally experiencing intense worry about saying the wrong thing, feeling rejected, disappointing someone, and/or shame spiraling after the fact. Social anxiety can also overlap […]

Somatic Therapy for Social Anxiety Read More →

Shame & Trauma Recovery

What is trauma-related shame? Traumatic shame tends to focus on identity: there must be something wrong with me. An intensely painful emotion where you believe that you are the problem. Such a conclusion is common among children who did not get the appropriate support and attuned responses from caregivers as well as from their environment growing up. Then, they carry such thoughts and beliefs into adulthood. Traumatic shame may appear in statements such as: “I must be broken.” “It’s my fault.”

Shame & Trauma Recovery Read More →

Somatic therapy for nervous system regulation

How Somatic Therapy can help your nervous system

What is nervous system regulation? Your nervous system is constantly working in the background, without you having to think about it. On one hand, it supports activity whether you are anxious and preoccupied, enjoy exercising, dancing, or getting really excited! On the other, your nervous system also supports rest, recovery, digestion and healing. Fundamentally, how your nervous system shifts states—how you weather stressors, ups and downs— is based on how your nervous regulates itself. Signs your nervous system might be

How Somatic Therapy can help your nervous system Read More →

Therapy for Asian Americans in NYC

How important is it to have a therapist of the same ethnic/cultural/racial identity? Many Asian Americans living and working in NYC are eager to find an Asian American therapist offering Somatic Therapy and trauma-informed approaches. For some, shared experiences provide more ease and understanding. Trust more readily builds in forming a relationship with an Asian American therapist. However, many who have experienced childhood trauma struggle with trusting even a therapist of similar background. So then, mistrust and lack of safety

Therapy for Asian Americans in NYC Read More →

Therapy for grieving and trauma recovery

Grieving In Trauma Recovery

Trauma recovery often includes processing grief Trauma recovery takes time, often due to a complexity of layers, including a multitude of emotions. One of the layers often includes grief. Both what happened and what didn’t happen. If only… regrets, wishes, disappointments, hurt, sadness… For many individuals I support who were abused, neglected and mistreated as children, grief may first come in the form of expressing anger. Moving out of denial, depression and shame. Maybe eventually learning to see through present-day

Grieving In Trauma Recovery Read More →

People Pleasing and Perfectionism

People-pleasing at first glance may seem altruistic, well-meaning, kind etc. It’s likely a habit you learned a long time ago, and may be an underlying source of stress. Wishing to please others generally may not be problematic. However, if people-pleasing habits are a way to seek external validation, then you may struggle with low self-esteem. If people-pleasing behaviors are essentially the only way you seem to know how to interact with others, chronic people-pleasing may be a sign of disconnection

People Pleasing and Perfectionism Read More →

Therapy for Childhood Trauma

Early trauma impacts many adults Anxiety, depression, difficulties metabolizing and expressing emotions, challenges in relationships and even physical health conditions are common for those who grew up in homes feeling unsafe, under chronic stress, with lack of support etc. Healing The Past: recovering from childhood trauma Often what brings the individuals I work with to therapy is the residue of childhood trauma: anxiety, depression, chronic tension and stress, difficulties trusting others, not feeling understood etc. What happened to you in

Therapy for Childhood Trauma Read More →

Therapy for BIPOC

DepresBlack, Indigenous and People of Color (BIPOC) need a space to feel our own dignity, worth and pride. In honor of Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. today, I found this speech where he suggests, “a deep belief in your own dignity, your own worth and your own somebody-ness… Don’t allow anybody to make you feel that you are nobody. Always feel that you count. Always feel that you have worth. And always feel that your life has ultimate significance.”

Therapy for BIPOC Read More →

Love Whole Being

Wholeness is intrinsically healing